Category: comedy



>– That life isn’t all about sex.


– That there must be something very great in marriage, that’s why the institution has survived morons like me, who do not believe in it.

– That eating the last piece of cake in the room is tougher than cracking an MBA exam.

– That there is always some whiskey in the bottle.

– That best friends are often jerks. You do need to see your alikes in this world at times.

– That its not the best thing to pataao your best friend’s sister.

– That there is no dearth of girls in this world.

– That crying at one’s pain is easiest, laughing is a bit tougher, but telling no one about it is the toughest thing.

– That its never too late untill its really late.

– That none of us can ever forget those eyes and that voice(for guys).


– That its not a right thing to call your ex if you still have got any feelings for her/him.

– That at one point in your life, you would believe that you have lost it, and you would be proven wrong by yourself.

– That truth is stranger than fiction.
– That love does exist, and its not mandatory to love just once. That funda is bull shit!

– That we all wish we were something which we do not understand properly.


– That some plans are executed best when executed in an unplanned manner.

– That some days are plain bad, you can’t do much about them.

– That no matter how much effort you put in, there will be an asshole to tell you its not enough.

– That looks have nothing to do with attracting girls, as far as you have the qualities.

– That some girls are bitches and some guys are bastards.

– That eating an apple a day actually contributes little towards keeping the doc away. Overrated proverb.


– That smoking kills lesser people than malnutrition does.


– That this post is stretching idiotically long and its time for me to sleep…..damnnn… quarter past 4 in the morning….ROFL!!!


– That contrary to popular belief, Daaru ke baad padhne mein bahut mazaaa aata hai!!! 😀

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>
Well, Actually its not a fracture.

Its merely a major sprain that got into my muscles due to 2X180 degree twisting of my ankle bone and as doc said, I had either a very good luck or very strong bones that my bones survived.

I would like to believe the second part, for I know how bad my luck is.

5 days plaster, or may be even more. Will write a lot of poems in these 5 days. Will start my UPSC preparations too. Will try to forget MBA thing as it attracts me no more after the eye openers. Will try to eat less food and drink even lesser fluid 😐 . For obvious reasons 😐

A plaster :sigh: . I am gonna get it autographed 😀 😀 😀


>Well…. 😦

watever….
I miss u idiot!

>:D :D :D


>Mobile lost :gm: :gm:

Sim closed :gm: :gm:

yahooooooooooooooooooooo :gm: :gm:


>

Let me tell you the story of two people. Friends or foes, you decide.

There was a man who was known for his witty remarks and rustic charm. The other claimed to have the support of the Muslims and Paswans. One had the trust in his M-Y equations, while the other boasted of being able to play the role of king-maker at the centre stage of Indian politics. One had ruled a state for about one-and a half-decade with all the members of his family coming to the party and enjoying their share of the moolah, while the other hogged the limelight due to his hold in the rural and poor population of Bihar.

Yes friends, I am talking about none other than two of of the most popular politicians of Bihar in recent decades, Mr. Laloo Prasad Yadav and Mr. Ram Bilas Paswan. The ones who have ruled the minds and hearts of lakhs of people once, and seemed almost invincible in their prime. The irony is though, one always goes down after her/his prime.

Though with all the might on their side and all sorts of equations(quadratic, tertiary whatever!!) favouring  them, it is now clearly visible that they have been left with almost nothing but an imaginary role to play.
They thought it was the perfect betrayal, they said it wil make them the king makers, and more than often, also loud mouthed the talks of actually getting the “power”.
A new front was formed and even the “mighty” and “confident-now” congress party seemed to have lost the ground beneath them.

Yes, whatever may be the views of the congress party top notch leaders now, everyone who keeps in touch with news would know how desperate were they back then. So desperate, that they didn’t shy away from approaching the “Miracle Man” of NDA in Bihar, Hon’ble CM Mr. Nitish Kumar!!! The way it all happened, the desperate-ness of the situation and the inability of both parties said it all, they were in deep shit!! Even the CM in question was unsure about going with NDA(remember, this relation between JD-U and BJP spans more than 10 years!!). All he could say was, “We will see”,”Yes we are with NDA ‘as of now’ ” and “who has seen tomorrow?”
Yes friends, I am right because this is one thing I can’t go wrong about. As it turns out, the night this interview of CM with Barkha dutt was the night I lost the most precious gem of my life and my mind would not have let go of anything it caught that day… Anyways, let’s not mix politics with emotions. It is usually sour.

Coming back to our self proclaimed philosophers, termed aptly as fool-osophers by me. Here we had a man who had done an almost impossible task, a miracle during his tenure as railway minister by turning the ever loss making, pathetic symbol of slowness, a PSU in shambles, into one of the most profitable enterprise controlled by the government of India. We had another man who said his motive was to bring the lower portion of the society into the mainstream and give them their share of GDP(Yeah he did say that, Mr. Paswan) One was sought after for the Management lessons not by just the IIMs; the premier institutes for management education in India; but even from Harvard and Yale, the Mecca and Medina of Management education.

Still, the guy somehow manages (or shall we say mismanages??) to screw up his own election campaign. The family people turned against him. Even the old friends deserted him. Management guru, huh!!Do you still think so?

Let’s have an insight of why this fiasco happened in first place.
Our Mr. Ex-railway minister’s wife, another ex-CM who barely knew the spelling of chief minister, or even Bihar, before she became CM, played a very crucial role in his downfall.She called Nitish Kumar “names”(Not very good ones…I think so) and cursed him. Okay, we all do these things, but not in front of microphones and cameras..and live on TV. I believe she was frustrated even beyond the trauma she faced when she had to attend her A,B,C,D classes… :p It was really hilarious to see her on television and blabbering words she doesn’t know the meaning of.
Our superhero perhaps tool a cue from her book an went on to “bulldoze” a guy as insignificant and ignoraant of his actions as Varun Gandhi.
Varun Gandhi? Well, unless you are a staunch supporter of people who kill anyone who is not hindu, you must be thinking I have mistaaken someone for the PM-in making, Rahul Gandhi. Sorry mate, Varun Gandhi was the latest fiasco of BJP(one of many in this election), courtsey Mr. L.K. Advani and Kalyan Singh, not to forget the Hitler-returns-Narendra Modi.

Anyways, our Mr. LP Yadav commits these scandalous-yet, to be ignored-mistaakes and partners with I-am gonna win-No matter I do anything or not-Mr. Paswan and forms a 4th front(I really feel sorry for this country which is forced to have four fronts…normal people have only one.. 😐  )

Results:-

RJD- 4 seats won against 20 of the last time.

LJP- 0 seat (or is it seats??) against 4 of the last time.

Someone has said, “There is a difference between genius and stupidity. Genius has its limits”

Our friends were limitless.


>
How often do you find a person who is an Engineer,Doctor,Journalist,Teacher etc etc etc, and is preparing for MBA? Not quite often? Well, I guess you are a loner, you do not socialize at all then.
Out of 10 people I meet, 7 are preparing for MBA or thinking about it as they “think”(I doubt that) that it would “give a boost” to their careers. Some say they want a better paycheck(Now this I can understand, but still have issues with it), while others say that it is their “Dream”. Still many are out there who simply are not too sure of the reason, but again they “think” it must be good, since everyone is doing it( Like it’s some new form of sex…eh…)

Well, why do we feel the need in first place to get an MBA degree? Is it the money?Or the career boost (or bournvita for that reason) thing? Or is it just a hazy dream(do not confuse with “wet dreams”) ? My question is, is it really what we think it is?

No! It is not that. There has to be more to it. Don’t you want to become someone else because you failed in becoming what you were meant to be, what you were taught to be. You failed to grasp the engineering concepts and today you are at complete loss as to how to direct the workers under you to fix a certain machine which stopped working last weekend. You failed to understand your networks paper properly(spending too much time checking girls out in the class?) and the result is today you can’t fix the issue in creating a secure network at your workplace. Or do you find yourself at the abyss of self confidence when it comes to manage your class, or reporting an accident to your local newspaper office?

So you have decided to run away. Great. You are on your way to become a certified loser. I would not stop you. Why? Simple, you would go on committing such mistakes, giving me apt reason and matter to write on(you see, writing is my hobby…and I sure enjoy it). Also, it would take more than just an advice to make you realise that you have committed a mistake by taking up MBA course at the cost of abandoning your current profession. It will take you a very much coveted MBA job to realise that. The moment when you realise that the MBA job is even tougher than your previous job, you would feel like running away from there also. And I bet you would not have any place to go then. Why? Ask yourself, weren’t it you who abandoned all you had just to get that “dream” fulfilled, to get that “extra money”, to have your share of career”boost”(I prefer complan and bournvita btw) and to get that sense of “I am doing it the right way as everyone is doing it that way…So what if I am getting screwed? Everyone is!!” Well I don’t think you would have same notions about all this MBA things then as you have now.

I am not advocating against MBA or something. I am just saying, do not go for it thinking that it will “change the course of your life”, because it would not. If you think running away from your responsibilities can make you immune to them, or can transform you into something who would learn other things quite effortlessly, then either you are a genius, or you-know-who. Riding up the ladder is not a bad thing, it never is! But jumping from one ladder to another just because yours had a tilted leg puts you in a grave danger. You do not have your ladder which you knew so well, and you will have to balance yourself on a new ladder which will sure take more time and even more effort.

So be sure about this MBA thing before you fill up the forms.. 😛

PS:- All this was written in a hazy state of mind, under the effect of studying hacking, web designing, Quants, EURC , hard rock music and a resolution of being smoke free(and hopefully liquor free) for a lifetime(which is not gonna end anywhere soon, not atleast for next 50-60 years)


>Well… I was lost…

Have said many bad things and and have thought too ugly of everyone when I realized that it was me who was making the situations worse by doing this to myself. So I have stopped now. And it feels calm. Peace atleast with myself. I do not need peace with others. I have stopped fighting with myself.

I am happy now. 🙂

I am going home, finally on 9th.

🙂


>Why do people marry? … I have some options…But would like to hear from you fellas….(If any) …think of some most innovative answers….and some serious ones… I am in the middle of this question….


>Well…. A funny incident in a long long time.
:p For a change, I welcomed it with open arms even though it caused me some inconvenience.

It was quite a boring sunday with everyone out of the house and me waking early. Did I say everyone?Well Vikash was there for sure. Asleep for ages. Lol. Poor guy has nothing better to do than to catch up with some sleep on these weekends. I wish he’d have put the time in something more productive. lol.

Anyways, I was watching a movie and waiting for the cats nd mouses racing inside my stomach to raise an alarm so that I would be forced to either go out and eat or cook something at home itself(You see, I am lazy myself… ). The movie ended with me in a deep desire(don’t think otherwise…plzzzzz) to have a shower. It was almost 12 nd though I bathed in the morning, it felt hot like sahara desert.(Ok I know I’ve never been there, but I can guess how hot it must be…right???) Suddenly I saw my cell phone, almost abandoned these days and strictly being used for just making calls home or receiving them from the same. Since I haven’t given the new number to many people its silent like never before. Though I miss the ringtone, I think I am at peace with myself in a long long time, though might be in pieces….. Whoa… In pieces, In Peace ….Nice title to start a book with…what say? Okay okay… I aint no Paulo Coelho… I know that. Still would like to write something with that title. I bet I have enough of ammo. to go with on such issues. :p

Ahhhh…I was talking bout something else….Mobile…yess…. Two missed calls…. Silent mode for the mobile is such a blessing in disguise… :p You dont wake your friends with the loud and bang bang ringtone…. And spare yourself another session on how to respect other solace and peace and SLEEP !!! 😡

Two missed calls….Twas a friend whom I have never met nor spoken to. Well, we have known each other for some 1 year and never spoken or met…. lol… Strange na… No issues… I called back and was welcomed with a very sweet voice, which turned out to be my friend… 🙂 She invited me to this poolside party in Juhu, it was some get together of a group of bloggers. I was in the middle of those mind boggling conflicts. I had this movie, Angel and Demons in the evening with my friends. I told her the situation and she said, “I am inviting you to a poolside party and you are worrying about a movie??? ” … “Well she’z right…I should better be going.. It would be a hell of mood change for me….”, I thought. So I called her back after inviting one of my friends over to the party. 5:30…I heard the time… “Well…there is enough time…” ..

I got down to some other business and at about 2:30 pm.. I smsed her to ask again the timing…”5:30, right? “… I got a call in 5 mins…. Then I come to know that the party was already going on and the timing was 12:30 to 5:30.. :p ROFLMAO….that was my first reaction…. I weighed all the options… I could still go alone but that would have been unfair to my friend who has dumped some of his important work for my sake and was still to reach home…. I told my friend that it wont be possible for me to come in that condition…. I was really disappointed…I was looking forward to meet new people….and most importantly…this friend whom I’ve never met…. But I was really laughing…. I called my other friend to tell that he better be getting on with his previous work…Sadly…He had already left…. I cursed myself… And said sorry…Put down the phone…. And told other friends that there is no more party…only to hear a huge roar of happiness from them… I cursed them too…and loudly…Afterall, what are friends for…..Then I got out for a haircut thinking of where I went actually wrong…. Then I got it… I should have confirmed the timing during the 1st conversation… I cursed myself again…lol… Suddenly thought of writing this experience…. Haven’t been online much off late. All kudos to my friend’s lappy which has gone mad… So here I am…writing another post…well…atleast I learnt an important lesson…. “Timing is very important…lol” whatever….

P.S. :- I got my movie ticket cancelled…. I aint not going to watch the movie… Everyone else is… 😦

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